The Ultimate Guide On How To Deal With Menopausal Rage

Rage?

Yep, it’s a menopausal ‘thing’ and usually occurs during perimenopause.

Or, maybe you’re suffering from anger?

That’s also a peri/menopausal ‘thing’.

This is one of the thornier aspects of perimenopause and menopause and one that’s not always acknowledged.

Many women don’t realise this is even happening (it’s everyone else falling out with them – they haven’t done anything!). Alternatively, they’re aware they’re acting out, they don’t know why and they’re embarrassed about their behaviour.

Either way, it’s a very real sign and an important one to talk about as it can impact our greater life and relationships.

But don’t worry you’re not going crazy.

There are plenty of memes online depicting meno women threatening to kill and while they’re amusing they’re also based on fact. I found this one on Pinterest. 😁

Let me say before we go further, there is a scientific reason for it.

It’s not you; it’s your hormones.

I hope that makes you feel immediately better!

Now, let’s dive in.

How does menopausal rage/anger feel?

If you’re one of us lucky (not!) ladies who experienced the intensity of PMS or mood swings during your period/pregnancy it feels similar to that. However, in some cases, it can feel far more elevated depending on how much your hormones fluctuate.

Menopausal rage

Menopausal rage goes a bit farther than anger – it boils up and reaches a fever pitch before exploding. That’s rage.

Menopausal anger

Anger is slightly milder and something we’ve all experienced at least at some stage in our lives.

Menopausal irritability

If you’re more fortunate your short fuse may never get quite as far as rage on your meno journey. Indeed, you might just get moody, intolerant or irritable. One study found that irritability is a common sign for 70 percent of women.

How menopausal rage rolls

You may find yourself shouting at other drivers, nitpicking at your husband or worse throwing things at him. Or perhaps saying things you never normally would to your friends and offending them hugely.

Real life example

I have a friend who has a history of throwing her toys out of the cot and storming off. But recently I’ve noticed it’s gotten worse. You can literally see her fuming and on the point of imploding and it’s always someone else’s ‘fault’. So many women don’t actually realise this is happening, that their mood has changed and they’re being offensive to their closest friends and family.

What causes menopausal rage & anger?

If you’re a regular reader here you’ll probably guess it’s to do with your fluctuating hormone levels. Hormones such as estrogen, progesterone, testosterone and cortisol.

When they’re doing their menopause dance they can bring on body temperature surges, sleep issues and all of those other pesky signs. Additionally, they affect your brain chemistry and make you feel more angry and irritable than you usually would.

The female hormone estrogen – or rather the decline of it in our ovaries – is a major player during the menopause transition. Indeed, it affects many of our physiological activities one of which is the production of serotonin in the brain.

Serotonin is often called the happy chemical and it’s an important neurotransmitter because it regulates our mood and acts like a happy pill.

Fluctuating estrogen can unbalance serotonin’s production and every time the level of estrogen shifts it throws serotonin levels off-kilter. That’s why you may go through periods of calm between the rage.

How to deal with menopause-fueled rage

1. Admit it

The first step is to admit you’re suffering from it.

Yes, it can be embarrassing. Especially if you fall into the camp where you didn’t realise this is where you’re at.

But it’s super important not to beat yourself up over it. Quite frankly your self-esteem probably doesn’t need the hit. Instead take a strategic approach and move to take control over it. And give yourself permission to be honest and to be vulnerable.